Friday, November 29, 2019
6 things you must quit doing now to be more successful
6 things you must quit doing now to be more successful6 things you must quit doing now to be more successfulMost of us grew up hearing the mantra Dont be a quitter, and weve internalized it to the point where we feel guilty even if we dont finish a book thats boring us to death. Our parents werent entirely wrong in saying that persistence is necessary for success, but sometimes quitting is the fruchtwein effective course of action. Whether its a failed project, a thankless job, or a doomed relationship, quitting can be a virtue.Quitting is leading too. Nelson MandelaAs it turns out, some of us are really good at knowing when to quit, while others have a hard time getting undeckenfries. Research from the University of Rochester found that people are motivated by either approach goals or avoidance goals.Those who fall into the approach camp are motivated by challenges and dont waste time trying to solve problems that simply dont have a feasible solution. In other words, they know when to quit.People motivated by avoidance goals, however, worry a lot more about failing. They want to avoid failure at all costs, so they keep plugging away at things, long after logic suggests its time to move on. This is typically a much less productive way to work.Knowing when to quit is a skill that can be learned. If you tend to get stuck on things long after its obvious that what youre doing isnt working, you can train yourself to do better. You just need to practice quitting. Thankfully, life provides plenty of opportunities to do this. Here are some things we should all quit doing.Quit doubting yourself.Confidence plays a huge role in success. Hewlett-Packard conducted an interesting study whereby they analyzed the process through which people applied for promotions at the company. Women, it turned out, only applied when they met 100% of the criteria for the job they wanted, while men applied when they met 60% of the criteria. The researchers postulated that one of the (many) reasons men dominated the upper echelons of the company is that they were willing to try for more positions than females. Sometimes confidence is all it takes to reach that next level. The trick is, you have to believe it. If you doubt yourself, it wont work. Faking confidence just doesnt produce the saatkorn results.Quit putting things off.Change is hard. Self-improvement is hard. Scrounging up the guts to go for what you want is hard, and so is the work to make it happen. When things are hard, its always easier to decide to tackle them tomorrow. The problem is that tomorrow never comes. Saying youll do it tomorrow is just an excuse, and it means that either you dont really want to do it or that you want the results without the hard work that comes along with it.Quit thinking you have no choice.Theres always a choice. Sure, sometimes its a choice between two things that seem equally bad, but theres still a choice. Pretending that there isnt one makes you a victim who is voluntarily taking on a mantle of helplessness. To play the victim, you have to give up your power, and you cant put a price on that. To succeed at the highest level, you have to quit giving your power away.Quit doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.Albert Einstein said that insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result. Despite his popularity and cutting insight, there are a lot of people who seem determined that two plus two will eventually equal five. The fact is simple if you keep the same approach, youll keep getting the same results, no matter how much you hope for the opposite. If you want different results, you need to change your approach, even when its painful to do so.Quit thinking everything is going to work out on its own.Its tempting to think that its all going to work out in the end, but the truth is that you have to make it work. This has many implications. Dont expect your boss to elendice when youre ready for a promotion , dont expect your colleague to stop sloughing work off on you if youre always willing to do it, and dont think that anyone is going to stop walking all over you as long as you allow it. Everything is not going to magically work out on its own you have to be proactive and take responsibility for yourself.Quit saying yes.Every yes you utter is a tradeoff. By saying yes to one thing, youre saying no to something else. Saying yes to staying late at work, for example, might mean saying no to the gym or to time spent with your family. Research conducted at the University of California, San Francisco, showed that the more difficulty you have saying no, the more likely you are to experience stress, burnout, and even depression. Saying no is indeed a major challenge for many people. No is a powerful word that you should not be afraid to wield. When its time to say no, avoid phrases such as I dont think I can or Im not certain. Saying no to a new commitment honors your existing commitments a nd gives you the opportunity to successfully fulfill them. When you learn to say no, you free yourself from unnecessary constraints and free up your time and energy for the important things in life.Bringing it all togetherThere are dozens of ways we get in the way of achieving our full potential. We doubt ourselves, we decide that something is just too hard, or we tell ourselves that well worry about it tomorrow. If you really want to succeed- and I mean really succeed- stop focusing so much on what you should be doing and, instead, take a really good look at the things you should quit doing.This article first appeared on LinkedIn.6 things you must quit doing now to be more successfulMost of us grew up hearing the mantra Dont be a quitter, and weve internalized it to the point where we feel guilty even if we dont finish a book thats boring us to death. Our parents werent entirely wrong in saying that persistence is necessary for success, but sometimes quitting is the fruchtwein effe ctive course of action. Whether its a failed project, a thankless job, or a doomed relationship, quitting can be a virtue.Quitting is leading too. Nelson MandelaAs it turns out, some of us are really good at knowing when to quit, while others have a hard time getting unstuck. Research from the University of Rochester found that people are motivated by either approach goals or avoidance goals.Those who fall into the approach camp are motivated by challenges and dont waste time trying to solve problems that simply dont have a feasible solution. In other words, they know when to quit.People motivated by avoidance goals, however, worry a lot more about failing. They want to avoid failure at all costs, so they keep plugging away at things, long after logic suggests its time to move on. This is typically a much less productive way to work.Knowing when to quit is a skill that can be learned. If you tend to get stuck on things long after its obvious that what youre doing isnt working, you can train yourself to do better. You just need to practice quitting. Thankfully, life provides plenty of opportunities to do this. Here are some things we should all quit doing.1. Quit doubting yourselfConfidence plays a huge role in success. Hewlett-Packard conducted an interesting study whereby they analyzed the process through which people applied for promotions at the company. Women, it turned out, only applied when they met 100% of the criteria for the job they wanted, while men applied when they met 60% of the criteria. The researchers postulated that one of the (many) reasons men dominated the upper echelons of the company is that they were willing to try for more positions than females.Sometimes confidence is all it takes to reach that next level. The trick is, you have to believe it. If you doubt yourself, it wont work. Faking confidence just doesnt produce the same results.2. Quit putting things offChange is hard. Self-improvement is hard. Scrounging up the guts to go for what you want is hard, and so is the work to make it happen. When things are hard, its always easier to decide to tackle them tomorrow. The problem is that tomorrow never comes.Saying youll do it tomorrow is just an excuse, and it means that either you dont really want to do it or that you want the results without the hard work that comes along with it.3. Quit thinking you have no choiceTheres always a choice. Sure, sometimes its a choice between two things that seem equally bad, but theres still a choice. Pretending that there isnt one makes you a victim who is voluntarily taking on a mantle of helplessness.To play the victim, you have to give up your power, and you cant put a price on that. To succeed at the highest level, you have to quit giving your power away.4. Quit doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different resultAlbert Einstein said that insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result. Despite his popularity and cutting insight, ther e are a lot of people who seem determined that two plus two will eventually equal five.The fact is simple if you keep the same approach, youll keep getting the same results, no matter how much you hope for the opposite. If you want different results, you need to change your approach, even when its painful to do so.5. Quit thinking everything is going to work out on its ownIts tempting to think that its all going to work out in the end, but the truth is that you have to make it work. This has many implications. Dont expect your boss to notice when youre ready for a promotion, dont expect your colleague to stop sloughing work off on you if youre always willing to do it, and dont think that anyone is going to stop walking all over you as long as you allow it.Everything isnotgoing to magically work out on its own you have to be proactive and take responsibility for yourself.6. Quit saying yesEvery yes you utter is a tradeoff. By saying yes to one thing, youre saying no to something else . Saying yes to staying late at work, for example, might mean saying no to the gym or to time spent with your family. Research conducted at the University of California, San Francisco, showed that the more difficulty you have saying no, the more likely you are to experience stress, burnout, and even depression.Saying no is indeed a major challenge for many people.Nois a powerful word that you should not be afraid to wield. When its time to say no, avoid phrases such asI dont think I canorIm not certain. Saying no to a new commitment honors your existing commitments and gives you the opportunity to successfully fulfill them.When you learn to say no, you free yourself from unnecessary constraints and free up your time and energy for the important things in life.Bringing it all togetherThere are dozens of ways we get in the way of achieving our full potential. We doubt ourselves, we decide that something is just too hard, or we tell ourselves that well worry about it tomorrow. If you r eally want to succeed - and I meanreally succeed- stop focusing so much on what you should be doing and, instead, take a really good look at the things you should quit doing.Travis Bradberry is the coauthor of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 and the cofounder of TalentSmart.This article originally appeared on LinkedIn.6 things you must quit doing now to be more successfulMost of us grew up hearing the mantra Dont be a quitter, and weve internalized it to the point where we feel guilty even if we dont finish a book thats boring us to death. Our parents werent entirely wrong in saying that persistence is necessary for success, but sometimes quitting is the most effective course of action. Whether its a failed project, a thankless job, or a doomed relationship, quitting can be a virtue.Quitting is leading too. Nelson MandelaAs it turns out, some of us are really good at knowing when to quit, while others have a hard time getting unstuck. Research from the University of Rochester found th at people are motivated by either approach goals or avoidance goals.Those who fall into the approach camp are motivated by challenges and dont waste time trying to solve problems that simply dont have a feasible solution. In other words, they know when to quit.People motivated by avoidance goals, however, worry a lot more about failing. They want to avoid failure at all costs, so they keep plugging away at things, long after logic suggests its time to move on. This is typically a much less productive way to work.Knowing when to quit is a skill that can be learned. If you tend to get stuck on things long after its obvious that what youre doing isnt working, you can train yourself to do better. You just need to practice quitting. Thankfully, life provides plenty of opportunities to do this. Here are some things we should all quit doing.1. Quit doubting yourselfConfidence plays a huge role in success. Hewlett-Packard conducted an interesting study whereby they analyzed the process thro ugh which people applied for promotions at the company. Women, it turned out, only applied when they met 100% of the criteria for the job they wanted, while men applied when they met 60% of the criteria. The researchers postulated that one of the (many) reasons men dominated the upper echelons of the company is that they were willing to try for more positions than females.Sometimes confidence is all it takes to reach that next level. The trick is, you have to believe it. If you doubt yourself, it wont work. Faking confidence just doesnt produce the same results.2. Quit putting things offChange is hard. Self-improvement is hard. Scrounging up the guts to go for what you want is hard, and so is the work to make it happen. When things are hard, its always easier to decide to tackle them tomorrow. The problem is that tomorrow never comes.Saying youll do it tomorrow is just an excuse, and it means that either you dont really want to do it or that you want the results without the hard wor k that comes along with it.3. Quit thinking you have no choiceTheres always a choice. Sure, sometimes its a choice between two things that seem equally bad, but theres still a choice. Pretending that there isnt one makes you a victim who is voluntarily taking on a mantle of helplessness.To play the victim, you have to give up your power, and you cant put a price on that. To succeed at the highest level, you have to quit giving your power away.4. Quit doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different resultAlbert Einstein said that insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result. Despite his popularity and cutting insight, there are a lot of people who seem determined that two plus two will eventually equal five.The fact is simple if you keep the same approach, youll keep getting the same results, no matter how much you hope for the opposite. If you want different results, you need to change your approach, even when its painful to do so.5. Quit thin king everything is going to work out on its ownIts tempting to think that its all going to work out in the end, but the truth is that you have to make it work. This has many implications. Dont expect your boss to notice when youre ready for a promotion, dont expect your colleague to stop sloughing work off on you if youre always willing to do it, and dont think that anyone is going to stop walking all over you as long as you allow it.Everything isnotgoing to magically work out on its own you have to be proactive and take responsibility for yourself.6. Quit saying yesEvery yes you utter is a tradeoff. By saying yes to one thing, youre saying no to something else. Saying yes to staying late at work, for example, might mean saying no to the gym or to time spent with your family. Research conducted at the University of California, San Francisco, showed that the more difficulty you have saying no, the more likely you are to experience stress, burnout, and even depression.Saying no is ind eed a major challenge for many people.Nois a powerful word that you should not be afraid to wield. When its time to say no, avoid phrases such asI dont think I canorIm not certain. Saying no to a new commitment honors your existing commitments and gives you the opportunity to successfully fulfill them.When you learn to say no, you free yourself from unnecessary constraints and free up your time and energy for the important things in life.Bringing it all togetherThere are dozens of ways we get in the way of achieving our full potential. We doubt ourselves, we decide that something is just too hard, or we tell ourselves that well worry about it tomorrow. If you really want to succeed - and I meanreally succeed- stop focusing so much on what you should be doing and, instead, take a really good look at the things you should quit doing.Travis Bradberry is the coauthor of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 and the cofounder of TalentSmart.This article originally appeared on LinkedIn.
Sunday, November 24, 2019
4 steps to getting anything you want in life
4 steps to getting anything you want in life4 steps to getting anything you want in lifeDont wish it was easier wish you were better. Dont wish for less problems wish for mora skills. Dont wish for less challenge wish for mora wisdom. - Jim Rohn1. Develop rare and valuable skillsIn the book, SO GOOD THEY CANT IGNORE YOU Why Skills Trump Passion in the Quest for Work You Love, Cal Newport debunks the myth of pursuing your passion.Can you have passion in your life? Absolutely.But healthy passion is just like confidence - you have to earn it. It is never compulsive.Passion and confidence are both byproducts of living a good life, of making good choices, and accomplishing personal goals.Most people are binnenseeking the wrong emotional experiences.Ladders is now on SmartNewsDownload the SmartNews app and add the Ladders channel to read the latest career berichterstattung and advice wherever you go.Its not passion you want. Passion just brings the whole experience to a higher level.What you really want is satisfaction with what youve done. You want to look back and be proud of what youve done. You want to watch yourself expand as a person. You want to watch yourself do incredible things. Put simply, you want freedom and you want connection.How can you not experience passion through this process? How can you not experience confidence?Most people are self-absorbed. They want work that makes THEM happy - and most never get success or happiness as a result.Instead of seeking youre own success - develop a craftsman mentality where you develop rare and valuable skills through deliberate practice. Develop true mastery at what you do. Become world-class.The craftsman is focused on what they can give to the world. Its so much better to give. Getting outside of your own head is where you find true clarity. Helping other people along their path furthers you along your own.Once youve developed rare and valuable skills, youre now in a rare position to chart your own path.You dont need to apply for jobs.You dont need to worry about gate-keepers.Youre your own gate-keeper.Your security is not in anything external - like a job, a paycheck, a college degree, societal expectations. Your security is internal. You trust yourself. You have confidence. Youre in alignment with your core values. You are connected to your higher power. Youve developed your routines and practices for making magic happen in your life. You collaborate with your environment to further your progress. Youve developed emotional and social intelligence, and thus, can connect quickly and deeply with anyone - Because its not about you, but them and you. Youre not trying to escape, but connect.2. Invest in yourself, your relationships, and your dreamsHow do you go from dreamer to doer? You abflug putting your money where your mouth is.Its seriously that simple.When you start putting money toward your skill development, your skills begin to increase 10X.You probably wont develop rare skills and abilities without investing large amounts into yourself.People dont become Olympians on their own. They have coaches, mentors, and a host of other people helping them. As the brilliant entrepreneur Michael Fishman has said, Self-made is an illusion. There are many people who played divine roles in you having the life that you have today. Be sure to let them know how grateful you are.There is a lot of time, money, and attention into developing mastery. Not everyone has a lot of money in the beginning. But as Seth Godin has said, Money is a story. If you dont believe you can have money, youll continue to live low-level principles that bring about poverty in mind and money.Dr. David Hawkins has said The unconscious will allow us to have only what we believe we deserve. If we have a small view of ourselves, then what we deserve is poverty. And our unconscious will see to it that we have that actuality What are the fastest ways to change your subconscious story about money?Start giv ing more of your money away - even if its small in the beginningInvest your money in your own personal development (even if that just starts with books)Invest money in other people - key relationships (even if this starts small)Some of the best mentorships youll have in the beginning are not in-person. Theyll be books you read and courses you take. You may spend a few hundred dollars over a few years. Although not a lot of money - youll begin to see huge benefits in that investment. Youll begin to yield a 10X transformation in your mindset.Eventually, youll start paying for live mentoring. That will also start small. You may invest a few hundred dollars for a 3060 minute phone call. Although it may seem inconsequential, this act will change your mindset 10X.Youll be seeking access.Youll be seeking direct information.And that seeking will begin to make a huge difference, because as Rumi said, What you seek is seeking you.Are you catching this?What once were thoughts in your head a re now you spending money are bringing the world you want to you. Youre bringing your key mentors to you. Youre bringing your key information and skills to you.Youre bringing it to you.In the amazing book, WRITE IT DOWN MAKE IT HAPPEN Knowing What You Want And Getting It, Dr. Henriette Anne Klauser explains the magic of writing down your goals and dreams.When you write stuff down - especially in the PAST TENSE, as though it already happened, something happens inside of you.You live far more in alignment with your dreams.On nights where I write down I woke up and wrote an amazing article (speaking in PAST TENSE about TOMORROW MORNING) I wake up and write an article.On days I dont do that, Im far less likely to write.You can live your life with confidence.You can come to expect amazing things to happen for you.The combination of investing more and more money into yourself, your relationships, and your dreams, as well as writing down in DETAIL the completion of your dreams is hard to beat.When you start investing money in yourself and your relationships money will come to you. The money story in your head will change.Youll start writing in your journal with confidence IM WEALTHY.You wont be afraid to write down specific and BIG amounts of money that youll earn. And youll continually watch as more and more money comes your way. Because youre developing better and rarer skills, investing in the right relationships, and making important stuff happen.For you, its not even about the money.Money is a vehicle.Youre not working for money, youre making money so you can do more and better work.In the book, THE ONE MINUTE MILLIONAIRE, Mark Victor Hansen and Robert G. Allen sayGiving as you get acknowledges the Universe as truly abundant. Giving taps into the spiritual dimension that multiplies us, our thinking, and our results. The Enlightened Millionaire knows this There is an ocean of abundance and one can tap into it with a teaspoon, a bucket, or a tractor trailer. Th e ocean doesnt care.When you invest in yourself, your money story changes. You realize that money isnt a finite thing. You realize that there isnt just one pie that we are all fighting for. You realize that you can make more pies. You become an innovator.Which brings me to3. Be a giver, not a taker, once youve invested yourself in the right relationshipsYou can have everything in life you want, if you will just help other people get what they want. - Zig ZiglarIve been part of several high-level masterminds. At this point, Ive spent hundreds of thousands of dollars to be part of select groups, or to get specific mentorships. I didnt come from money - none of my parents have much. I just invested nearly everything Ive made back into myself - even when I was making less than $1,000 per month. And those investments 10Xd in money back to me very quickly. From small amounts to big ones. Its having a vision for your future and knowing youll get it. Again, security is internal. Faith is power.Unfortunately, I see the same things from most people, even at this level. Theyre trying to get an immediate return on their investment.Thats not how you go 10X.This is the equivalent of buying a book for $25 and saying to yourself the whole time youre reading the book - Alright, wheres my $25 back?Thats not how you take an investment and make it much, much bigger.What you do when you invest yourself in relationships isSeek to be in a specific environment with certain types of people where ideas can pollinate and collaborateGive your rare skills and abilities in service to the right people (ideally the people who you want to MENTOR YOU)Yes, the best way to advance yourself quickly is to GIVE YOUR BEST WORK to your ideal mentors - usually for free Actually, you often PAY THEM to help them.This logic doesnt make sense to most people.Pay someone to work for them? YesWhen you pay someone AND THEN HELP THEM, crazy stuff starts happening. When you start being more giving with your money, your skills, and your time - to the right people - the money story in your head changes completely.You realize you can have what you want.The world will continually give you what you need.Whoever you need access to, you can get access to. And not just access, but an intimate and deep mentorship and connection. Youll quickly see that those you were helping become your biggest advocates. All of a sudden, you have a world-class network and limitless opportunities.Its at this point that you really need to gut-check your values. The reason you succeeded this much isnt because you were seeking success directly. You believe in what youre doing. Youre a convert to your own method. Youre not just looking for a quick win or trying to be successful.Keep things in perspective.4. Make the right asks - and get above the line of super credibilityRainmakers generate revenue by making asks. They ask for donations. They ask for contracts. They ask for deals. They ask for opportunities. The y ask to meet with leaders or speak to them over the phone. They ask for publicity. They come up with ideas and ask for a few minutes of your time to pitch it. They ask for help. Dont let rainmaking deter you from your dream. Its one of the barriers to entry, and you can overcome it. Once you taste the sweet victory of a positive response, youll not only become comfortable with it, you might even enjoy it. But making asks is the only way to bring your dream to life. - Ben ArmentMost people ask for help way too soon.You want to make your asks ABOVE THE LINE OF SUPER CREDIBILITY.In the book, BOLD How to Go Big, Create Wealth and Impact the World, Peter Diamandis and Steven Kotler explain that if you want to do something big, you need credibility.You need to be believable.If you want to get on a big podcast, you cant just pitch yourself. You need someone whose already been on the podcast to pitch you.Peter Diamandis wanted to start XPRIZE to revolution the space industry. He spent seve ral years getting billionaires and astronauts on board with his plan, so that when he presented his plan, it was believable.It wasnt only credible. It was SUPER CREDIBLE.When you develop rare and valuable skills, and have invested big in the right relationships - youll be able to make big asks. Then, the people youve invested in will actually make the asks for you, and it will be so much more powerful coming from them.Thisarticleoriginally appeared on Medium.
Thursday, November 21, 2019
Millennials living at home arent saving more money, and are working less
Millennials living at home arent saving more money, and are working lessMillennials living at home arent saving more money, and are working lessWhen it comes to how millennials live, the most common narrative is that theyre either gathering in big cities, or choosing to live at home with their parents in large numbers. The choice to live at home and often save money and pay off student debthas often been painted as a canny one in the media but data shows that the reality is more complicated than that.Comet, a company that helps manage student loan debt, surveyed 1,000 Millennials aged 22-37 about their living arrangements, their salaries, their debt, and how much theyd saved.A third of Millennials are bunking with their parents nationwide, while 69% are living alone or with roommates, according to 2015 U.S. Census Bureau data. For the Millennials living at home, theyre paying a price in independence and satisfaction Theyre 5.5 times more likely to report being not at all satisfied w ith their living arrangements than those who live on their own.Millennials living at home were also less likely to be employed full-time, at 54% compared to 75.7% employment for Millennials living on their own. Those living at home were more likely to be students, part-timers, or unemployed.When it comes to earnings, there is a wide disparity between Millennials living at home versus independently. Over 1 in 3 Millennials living at home reported earning less than $15,000 a year. However, 45% of those living on their own reported making between $35,000-$74,999.Those living at home, perhaps because they did not have the access to as many job opportunities, were not able to save as much as Millennials living on their own, even though they paid less rent.Millennials living on their own paid an average of $853.10 in monthly housing costs and had an average of $11,310 in savingsMillennials living at home paid an average of $286.70 in housing costs each monthly housing costs and had an ave rage of $7,464 in savings. They also had about $200 less than those living on their own left over once the bills were paid at the end of the month.37% of those living at home are not at all satisfied with their finances, as compared with 21% of those living on their own.Contrary to received wisdom, it may be smarter for Millennials to fly the nest sooner than later, if only for the greater wealth of opportunities that could expand their earning power and mitigate the cost of rent.
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